I am Hannah’s other half, Nick, making a guest appearance in her blog, albeit about 3 weeks later than was advertised! For every ounce of organisational skill Hannah possesses I have the equal lack of it. It works well, especially for me! It is also the reason that, if Grape takes after me in the slightest, she will definitely be born late. Which nicely leads me into talking about fatherhood…
|This is how you hold a baby, right?|
There’s a lot of material I think I could write about becoming a Dad. And I’m not even officially at fatherhood yet! I could talk about how absolutely amazing it is approximately three days after you find out you’re going to be Dad, when it sinks in that you really are going to have a little baby. Or the feeling of wonder when you see your baby on the ultrasound for the first time and, even better, the first time (and fiftieth time – I haven’t got bored of it yet!) you feel her kick. It is a fabulous feeling unlike any other. But there’s also a slight feeling of fear too. Will I be a good Dad? How will I cope changing nappies for the first time? How am I ever going to manage to be completely and utterly responsible for another person? I barely manage to look after myself!
A lot of people have asked me if I think I’m ready to be a Dad. And my broad answer is yes. I am fully aware that there’s no way we are completely prepared for Grape (not least that we haven’t moved house yet!) but we have put a lot of groundwork in: buying things, reading baby books, buying things, talking to other new parents, buying things. Coupled with the fact that billions of people have managed to do this before us…so it can’t be completely impossible, can it?! I’m sure we’ll do things wrong, and I’m sure we’ll make mistakes whilst bringing Grape up, but I honestly can’t wait for it to happen. I can’t wait to meet her, see what she looks like and see what kind of personality she has. I’m looking forward to hearing her first words and watching her take her first steps, along with those other big life moments that you hear about, as well all the ones you don’t.
I think my biggest worry about the whole thing is the anticipated lack of sleep. I know I don’t do well without sleep and nor does Hannah, and I suspect there will be some difficult times ahead. But as Babies and Toddlers for Men by Mark Woods says (my current baby book of choice), “Accept that you will be tired, accept that you will be beyond tired and accept that despite it all, you just have to carry on. Think of it not as something to be endured but as a rite of passage, an extreme sport to be taken on and beaten”. And the thing is I know we will get through it. I know that we’ll do whatever we have to for this wonderful little person that is joining us soon. I know there are going to be wonderful highs and emotional lows, probably more so than ever before in our lives, but I really cannot wait for the first time I get to hold my daughter in my arms, as well as every single moment with her and Hannah from then on.
Thanks for reading – and hopefully I’ll manage to get another post in before the baby is born and we become sleep-deprived zombies!