(I) Do // Wedmin Angst
I used to be a very organised person. I loved organising. But since having Busby, my zest for organisation has disappeared.
At the moment I feel exhausted. Totally wiped out. In need of a serious holiday and some baby-free time. I also need a rejuvenation pod to fix my wilting body and mind.
So here we go: I can’t be bothered to organise our wedding. Oh golly, that sounds awful doesn’t it?
The wedding just seems like too much effort. 2012-me would be slapping 2013-me right now screaming “WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??” But it’s true.
We don’t have any money. Our budget is teeny.
The reception venue I fell in love wasn’t available for the date we wanted in October, so we’ve been thinking about moving the date to August. I don’t really want to get married in August. What if there’s a heatwave and I look horrific in all of the photos due to red face and sweat patches?
I’m not a summer person. I like autumn. I like the cool breeze. I like the browns, yellows, reds and oranges in the trees. I like the dark nights.
I’m having doubts about the venue. It was my dream venue, but I think I fell too fast. It’s huge; how will we light it? How will we decorate it? How will we cover up the awful exhibition that taints the otherwise beautiful space? I don’t want my guests walking around reading about protestants being killed.
Happy Wedding Day!
The manager seems so casual about the whole affair. I don’t need casual. What if the hall isn’t clean on the day? Or they forget we’re having our reception?
We can’t find a ceremony room that fits more than 50 guests. I don’t want to invite a large(ish) percentage of my 25 as I want my friends to be there. People that have actually supported me through life. Not people who told me to “get over” losing my Father after 5 years. Not people who I haven’t heard from since giving birth. Why would I want to invite them? Why should I have to?
I have serious wedmin angst, and this is only the start of our wedding planning journey. Does it get easier? Will I suddenly have a “eureka!” moment and everything will fall into place? I jolly well hope so.