Tomorrow morning we will find out which Primary School you will be attending from September.
Which colour uniform you will have your ‘First Day of School’ photos taken in.
Which school gates I’ll be sobbing at when I drop you off for the first time.
And, as I sit here typing this evening, I am so very nervous about the outcome.
I am nervous because we love your preschool, but the chances of you getting a place are slim due to catchment issues.
I am nervous because you’ve already made some lovely friends at your preschool, but July may be the last time you see them within a learning environment, and that must be quite a difficult thing to comprehend at four and a half years of age.
I am nervous because I’ve also started to make some lovely friends at the school gate, and having them there to chat to at 3.30pm never fails to make my day.
My last point above – is that a selfish reason to be nervous? It probably is. This is about you after all. But, I’ve found relocating to Yorkshire so difficult, and I get so flustered talking to new people. The school gate – and consequently the people I’ve met – have been my saviour on my very sad days. It’s taken two years to feel like I almost belong, and your school gate has helped in this immeasurably.
As well as the nerves I feel sad; I feel like so much of your little life has flown by in a whirlwind of big changes.
Have I appreciated you enough? Definitely not.
Have I spent as much time concentrated on just you as I would have liked? No way.
But, on the other hand, working from home has meant that I’ve been able to spend that little bit of extra time with you that I may not have had the opportunity to have if I’d still been in my old role.
Entering the education system is a big deal. And we have to get it right for you.
You are not a number.
You are not just a name.
You are an incredible, intelligent and funny little girl with the biggest imagination, and I pray that wherever you end up for Reception (and beyond) will be the right learning environment for you.
And that you will enjoy yourself in the classroom.
I’m waffling on now, so I will close this letter and try to get some sleep without constantly checking my phone for the email which determines your future.
All my love