This week Peppercorn is the size of a spaghetti squash and he’s about 28cm long! February has flown past, and as I put dates in my diary and plan to meet up with friends, I can see that he will be here before we know it… which is both exciting and terrifying in equal measure. I can’t wait to meet him! We should be in our new house by mid-April, if not before, which is excellent news, as we’ll hopefully have a couple of months to settle, get Busby into a Nursery and decorate the house before he arrives and we don’t want to do anything but snooze for 6 months…
I’ve been suffering from nightmares this week, and incredibly vivid ones at that! I haven’t been getting the best nights sleep, and a change in Busby’s routine means that she has been waking up at 6.45-7am some mornings, so by the time she goes to bed I’m feeling fairly shattered too. Something about her energy is infectious, and (on the whole) it keeps me buoyant during the day… well, Toddler energy and cake.
My feet have started to swell a bit when I’ve been on them all day. I never really suffered from swollen feet (or swollen anything) when I was pregnant with Busby, so I’m surprised that it’s a) happening so early on and b) is happening at all, as I’m much fitter than I was when I was pregnant with her. I guess different pregnancies throw up different issues, and my cravings have all been fairly salty.
I booked a Midwife appointment for this week to discuss a few things. I’ve been wondering whether my bleeds have anything to do with my endometriosis; I suffered badly with endometriosis before I fell pregnant with Busby, and a few marker symptoms had started cropping up in the months leading to Peppercorn’s conception. The Midwife thought this might be the case, but she’d never come across this previously, so I have to chat to the Consultant about it. Thankfully I haven’t had any bleeds for over a week now, so fingers crossed it’s all ok.
The Midwife appointment gave me the opportunity to talk about my current mental state. I’ve suffered from depression on and off for almost 15 years now, and having just got back on a (sort of) even keel from my PND, I’ve found myself in daily tears, with horrific anxiety, panic attacks and a lot of social anxiety issues over the past few weeks. The Midwife was fantastic, and although she can’t refer me for talking therapy, as it’s self-referral up here in West Yorkshire (no wonder all us new mums are struggling!), she did give me all the information I need so I could refer myself. Goodness knows what the waiting list is like, but if it’s epic then I’m going to look into private CBT sessions as I really need to talk to someone before I give birth.
In happier news, I saw Peppercorn move my tummy for the first time this week! It’s been so much fun watching him squirm about, and I can’t wait until I can tickle one of his toes.
I’ve not had any strong cravings this week… Lamb tikka has featured quite highly on my food-related wants, as have scones, but I haven’t been desperate for anything like I have in previous weeks. I’ve also been enjoying Cadbury’s Caramel eggs!