There have been days where I’ve considered walking out and leaving because I couldn’t handle anymore screaming and crying from my newborn. There have been even darker days where I’ve felt as though I’ve been having a full-on breakdown; shuffling around the house like a zombie on only 2 hours sleep, tear stains streaking my face, wishing I could just escape by any means possible. Our marriage has also been through a rocky patch; severe sleep deprivation and dark whizzing hormones accompanied resentment for being able to have time away from the intensity of the situation (even if it’s just going to work).
It’s completely irrational, but when you’re living in a world where you’re screamed at for the majority of the day. When you can’t put the baby down anywhere because all you can hear are loud, desperate screams. When you can’t leave the house for fear that your baby will have a meltdown, and that you also might breakdown in front of the general public… You need a break. You need a hug. You need a friend. [Read more…]